Many years ago, my therapist had me working on asking for what I wanted and needed. I had some big decisions I needed to make around my health and I always had a hard time speaking up. You know that feeling—not wanting to put anyone out, wanting to make life easier for everyone else, not wanting to “rock the boat” or become a burden.
But who does that hurt? Yup, ourselves.
I started practicing ‘asking for what I wanted’ in small baby steps. For instance, at the bakery I would annoy the clerk by pointing out the exact donut I wanted and I could often tell the annoyance felt by them.
But you know what I learned? Little by little, I felt more empowered. Little by little, I learned that I was speaking up for myself. I started in small ways and practiced more and more. When I needed to make bigger requests or set bigger boundaries, I had the practice. Yes, it was still uncomfortable but it got easier over time. The more I did it, the more I knew and felt I was worth it.
I know I am not the only one who has felt this way (and I still do; these beliefs are so deeply engrained in us). Perhaps you are like me. Perhaps this will help you too.
May we keep walking this journey.
Xo